Thursday, November 20, 2014

Nebraska to Cancel Remainder of Football Season and Discontinue Program

I saw a report today that cocoa crops are threatened by global warming......maybe people will take it seriously now that chocolate is an endangered species. * * * * * I'm opposed to the Keystone Pipeline for many reasons, and am amused at the wildly exaggerated numbers of permanent jobs Republicans claim will be created - tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, or millions, while the CEO of TransCanada says about 50 permanent jobs will be created. Most of the jobs are in the construction which could very well be in the thousands for a couple of years, which for a welder, is a long term job. But, personally, I think he is understating the number of permanent jobs. If you add in the folks doing the inevitable and ongoing oil spill clean up it's probably closer to 75, or maybe even 100...... * * * * * * George W. Bush is getting a Texas elementary school named after him. That seems about right to me. * * * * * Here's another Andy Rooney question for you. Why is it that those who claim to venerate and worship the Constitution of the United States hate the Post Office? It's one of the few government agencies actually mentioned in and established by that same Constitution .......... * * * * * In a stunning development today, House Republican Speaker John Boehner announced that if President Obama issues an Executive Order on immigration, the entire Republican membership of the House of Representatives will resign. "Why even have a House of Representatives if the President just does what he wants anyway?" he mumbled when asked why he has never brought the bipartisan Senate Immigration Reform Bill to a vote on the House floor. "What else can we do? Sue him? We can't find a law firm to even do that. It's like nobody takes us seriously," he sobbed. The President was said to be considering the ramifications of a Republican empty House. "It's not like they're doing anything now," he said. "But it would be weird." * * * * * In a surprise move, the Nebraska Board of Regents has discontinued the Nebraska football program, effective immediately. "Enough is enough," one Regent was heard to say. "The embarrassing blow-out loss to Wisconsin was just the icing on the cake of year after year of disappointment. Once? maybe - it happens. But twice? We don't even want to play Minnesota or Iowa now. Like the action at UNO several years ago, eliminating the football program on the Lincoln campus will elevate hockey, soccer, and women's volleyball as its primary sports." Bo Pelini will be offered the typical $250 million buyout of his contract an anonymous Regent said. "This is the best option we have," said one tearful Regent. "I just can't take it anymore. Where's Bob Devaney when you need him?" * * * * * By the way, today marks the 2346th day the Republicans have failed to deliver their long promised alternative to Obamacare .......... maybe tomorrow.


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