Fake News Alert – The following is half truthy and half wit, as am I. It may or may not be mildly amusing. ........Donald Trump pummeled his Mar-a-Lago caddie with a hybrid fairway metal after the caddie, Jose Fuentes, gave him an incorrect yardage yesterday on Hole 12 at Trump's Florida golf resort Saturday. The caddie, 43, and the father of five, is in critical condition at a local hospital with a skull fracture and severe lacerations about the head. Kellyanne Conway, Trump's spokesperson and trusted advisor said, "Donald is a passionate man, and after he ejected a critical biographer of Trump who was in a foursome with one of the Koch brothers from the course, he was having a terrific round until the mistaken yardage was given," Conway said. "I mean, who wouldn't be angry?" she said. The Koch brother, a member of Trump's country club, and his guest were escorted from the course by Trump's private security force and were seen driving away with the rest of that group's foursome, including the writer of the critical biography. "He's a lousy golfer, anyway," Trump was heard to say about the biographer. "Can't write either." Trump was also heard to say, "You're fired," to Mr. Fuentes as he beat him about the head. "I'd have hit my hybrid 7 metal if you'd given me the right yardage. And you can forget about that green card." Trump was later seen with boxing promoter Don King, who stepped in as Trump's caddie, holding a Russian flag stick for Trump on the 17th green as Donald lined up a putt. "It's like Mr. Trump said about the UN the other day," Conway concluded. "Things will be different starting Jan. 20. And by the way, in regard to Mr. Fuentes, it's not a crime if the President does it." * * * * * * * * * * * I spent New Year's Eve with a nasty cold, tissue stuffed up both nostrils, watching "12 Monkeys," a favorite Bruce Willis movie of mine. I'm hoping 2017 improves. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Noting that Australia celebrated the New Year before America did, Donald Trump has vowed to move the international dateline and make America first in 2018. "It'll be tremendous," he said. "And why does China get its own new year? America should be first because we are great again." * * * * * * * * *I think there's a 50% chance Trump will get us into a war accidentally --- and a 50% chance he will get us into a war on purpose. * * * * * * * * On another subject, I saw a fb post that said the etymology of the word "dog" was uncertain, and lo and behold, I checked the Oxford English Dictionary and several words for animals ending in the voiced velar plosive "g" have uncertain etymologies: dog, stag, frog, pig. Who knew? * * * * * * * * * * * And seriously, to all who lost loved ones in 2016, my condolences. To all who found a loved one or ones in 2016, congratulations! Personally, I am hoping for fewer of the former and one or more of the latter in 2017. Happy New Year.
2 Comments:
"Who knew?" *I* knew, being an aficionado of English-language history, if you don't put too fine a point on "aficionado." Other etymologically mysterious basic English words include horse, sheep, lamb, child, and king... a couple of handfuls of them... presumed to have originated with the indigenous (pre-Germanic) inhabitants of Scandinavia, the guys who got there first... which always makes me wonder WHY these folks, more ancient than the ancient Germanic tribes, ended up in Norway when there was more hospitable and equally unpopulated real estate in, say, Bali.... So it's linguistic rather than archaeological evidence that postulates these so-called indigenous peoples, since other language families, including Latin, have proto-Indo-European-derived words for horse, sheep, etc.... PIE hekwos > Latin equus, and PIE reg > Latin regis, for example. Equus and regis being very unlike horse and king, it's assumed that these words originated with inhabitants who were absorbed into the Scandinavian tribes. It's fascinating to think about... that an everyday word such as horse has persisted virtually unchanged for three thousand years or so, through plague, famine, but not (as far as we know) Trump.
Wow! Score one for the afficianado gallery! Cool. I was able to find "trump" in the OED, BTW, and the root word for it is apparently "pimp." Interesting, and totally truthy too!
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